My Initiation

Author's note: This is my first foray into science fiction. The author is taken by force in the first half of the story, but don't let it trouble you. Trust me, looking back, he enjoyed it. I'm very interested in what you all think, so please comment.

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Synopsis: A barbaric ritual reunites me with an old friend and helps me come to terms with my new life. There's been talk lately about if you are born with or choose your sexual orientation. What if someone else makes you this way, and you don't get a vote?


We gave too much control to our Government. It happened slowly, as it often does. But it took a giant leap when a new procedure was developed to install a tiny microchip in the brains of patients with certain diseases. The technology took off, and other applications quickly emerged: better focus and memory, stronger immunity, even small benefits to strength and anti-aging. It was a luxury of the rich, but expanding socialistic government programs quickly made it available to the masses. Soon you were required to have one installed at birth to receive other benefits, and then even for basic rights. Within thirty years, the entire population of our country had them. The land of the free, home of the brave. Nothing could go wrong, right?

Then a crisis emerged, and governments often uses crises to assume more power. The equal balance of boys and girls born into our world began to change. Females began to die more and more in the womb, and less females were conceived to begin with. The percentage of babies born that were female fell from fifty to forty, then on down to twenty percent. The decline had slowed, and after fifty years seemed to be stabilizing at about eleven percent.

Every country handled things differently. Our biggest problem was crime and a decreasing population. Crimes against women like rape were first to spike, but then other crimes like murder, theft, and just about anything else rose also. People were so unhappy. There were millions of single men out there with no mating prospects in a declining country where humanity's survival seemed to be in jeopardy. Science scrambled to find a cure, but none came.

The solution was as diabolical as it was effective. Scientists understood the genetic markers for homosexual tendency. It was a very complex combination of genes, so they focused instead on the brain chemistry differences that were symptoms of the genetics. They found a way to use the chip in everyone's brains to alter their brain to permanently mimic the conditions in a gay male. The same technology to cure Alzheimer's was used to change our sexual orientation. After a test in a couple states without telling anyone, they rolled it out to the whole country to any adult males that were not married. It was so easy. The instructions were sent to the chip without the recipient's knowledge.

Crime went down almost immediately, and not just crimes against women, but all crime. The reasons were controversial and gave political correctness a big middle finger, but the results spoke for themselves. Society began to stabilize with a new norm. Babies conceived from donated eggs were grown in test tubes and given to gay couples to raise. The small percent of the population that was female thrived and had their pick of mates. Women grew in power and were revered and cherished, and many were positioned in the nation's highest offices.

Years later, this process of turning men gay had been so integrated into our society's traditions that the people didn't challenge it. The men in power were married to women or had already been through "The Change" and saw no need to repeal the rules for young men. Our Government turned it into a rite of passage, a sacrifice a man made for the State. It was an honor to submit to this. It was disgraceful to object.

A barbaric ritual was developed to bolster the State's control. A man's "Initiation" signified a his submission to his government and dedication to the preservation of our society. When of age, young men had to report to a government facility, where they were forced to submit to another man. The "Volunteer" would take the young man anally. His ejaculate would be absorbed by the recipient's insides, stimulating hormonal changes that told the chip inside his brain to initiate the change.

Could the government have used the chip's technology to perform this change without a ritual like this? Or could they have at least injected the semen artificially? Of course. How did they do it when they did the first roll-out? But the Initiations taking place every day across the country were tradition now. It was hard to stop traditions when the people in charge had been through them and viewed them as a rite of passage, no matter how immoral.

There were only two ways to get out of this. A woman could name you as her mate. To do this, she had to be at least within two years of being an adult and choose you during the same month you were due for the change. The second way was voluntary castration. Over 99% of the men not chosen by ladies chose to go through the change. Once chosen, women held more power than in the old marriage dynamic. In the event of a divorce, the man had to be claimed within six months by an eligible female or go through the change. Needless to say, the abysmal divorce rate improved dramatically.

Older men that had been through the change started looking at you differently when you were coming of age. A new pool of virile young men were about to be thrust into the gay male playing field. The first time I noticed was when we had a lot friends of the family over for a dinner party the night of my graduation. It was nothing fancy, just lots of beer and burgers. My birthday had already passed, meaning my Initiation could be any day now. We only got two days' notice, arriving sometime during your first year as a man. My neighbor John was about thirty years old, and he'd barely even spoken to me in the years that I'd lived there. But now I noticed him checking me out from time to time out of the corner of my eye. It was a lewd, longing gaze, and it kind of freaked me out. I had to respect how women must feel, outnumbered almost ten to one by horny men in high school.

He always drank too much, and I overheard him quietly talking to another guy asking if I'd been bred yet. "Bred" was slang for having been through your Initiation and gone through the change. Then he expressed a comment along the lines of he'd love to fuck me. I got a nice compliment on my butt thrown in there, too. The guy he was talking to, who I didn't know at all hardly because he worked with my dad, agreed. I had mixed feelings of pride and contempt. I liked women still and didn't want anyone imagining bending me over to get at that butt they seemed to like. I came around from the corner and startled them. "Not yet," I mumbled to the two surprised guests on the way to the kitchen.

I waited for my notification from the government with dread. I loved women and didn't want to change. I wasn't a virgin. It was technically illegal to have sex with an unmarried woman, including of course minors. But most high school women loved to fuck. There was no risk of disease anymore, and pregnancy was impossible without a license. A woman's microchip took care of birth control. They were empowered, in high demand, and took charge of their sexuality. I was very popular in school. I did lots of sports, was over six feet tall, and had a decent head on my shoulders, so I managed to have sex with most of the women in my class. But I had failed to connect with any of them, and so it was unlikely anyone would show up at my Initiation to choose me. Even my best friend Beth had turned a cold shoulder to me recently.

I finally got my notification on a Thursday, over three months after becoming an adult. I was beginning to think there had a been a clerical error and I might be spared, but that was impossible, wishful thinking. At least the timing was good. It was the holiday season, and I'd have some time off afterward to deal with the changes.

I was months into my full-time job and was in the process of moving still, so I lived at my parents' house, just like many other Initiates since the real estate market was so tight due to overpopulation. That night, just as expected, I got a knock at the door. My parents knew who it was. Nobody just knocked on your door these days.

I opened the door to meet my "Priestess" as we called these women. It had nothing to do with religion, and in fact really flew in the face of it. The Priestess was an unofficial volunteer position. A woman who made house calls, traditionally the night before a young man's Initiation. She was traditionally a very skilled, attractive lover. She would fuck a guy as best she could to give him a glimpse of the love of a real woman before sending him off to be turned gay. Most men would lose their virginity this way. Some like me had fucked quite a few women, but since that was illegal, nobody knew, and I still got my visit from her. As long as you either were on track for graduation or were working full time and had no criminal record, you were usually afforded this luxury.

The Priestess was a position of honor. Women chose this duty, if they were good enough. That's how much power women had now since they made up a small percent of the population. They were almost all married and upper class citizens with powerful positions themselves or by association with their husbands. Nobody slut-shamed these women that went around and gave men their "last rites" as we affectionately nicknamed it. Husbands didn't mind, because that was just the culture of the day. It was an honor for your wife to be chosen.

My company for the evening was a beautiful red head, perhaps in her late thirties. She never gave her name, but I did recognize her from somewhere. Her dress was sexy, but more professional than slutty. It was as if she had come straight from a late night at the office. The diamond on her ring finger was at least a couple carats. This was a woman that came from money. She was very fit, and when the dress came off, I realized she had a better body than most women my age. Her breasts were perfect, small but beautiful. She proved herself to be a natural red head, but the pubic hair was closely trimmed and contained to the area above her crack.

She was very kind and fun, and even though years of experience separated us, we connected and had a few laughs. She was on top the first time I entered her. Her pussy was dripping wet from her own arousal. She apparently really loved her job. She felt very loose when I first sunk into her to the hilt. The young women I had been with were much tighter. But I realized really fast that I didn't know what the hell I was talking about. She began to use those muscles to grip me: muscles in her pussy that were hardened by years of experience fucking guys like me. She milked me so well, I didn't have a chance. I came within thirty seconds, filling her pussy with about a week's worth of pent-up load.

I apologized, but the Priestess just smiled and told me not to worry, she had meant to do that. We rested for a bit, then we fucked until I came two more times. With her encouragement, I took her in many positions. I came one more time in her pussy and then deposited the last, smaller one into her mouth.

She stayed with me for a few hours after that. She was a great companion, better than any man could ask for from a one-night stand. I only had one weak moment, shedding a tear when I realized I would never be with a beautiful woman like this again. She smiled kindly and told me what I already knew. After my change, I would feel the same way about men, and my mind would not fall into depression because I felt I was missing out. Later I drifted off, and she left sometime in the middle of the night.

I worked the next day, but I couldn't concentrate. I was a nervous wreck. People knew. Once Initiation dates were announced, it was public knowledge. Most of my coworkers were older and had already been through it. That night I slept great and woke up refreshed. That is just something weird about how my body worked. When I was the most nervous, I went to bed exhausted and slept like a rock.

I cleaned up a bit at home first on the afternoon of my big day. The tiny disposable enema tip was the first thing I had ever inserted into my rectum, and I didn't like it at all. I did not want to go through with this ritual, but I just felt I would be even more humiliated if I couldn't control my bodily functions. My appointment at the facility was the standard early evening time slot. I was scared, depressed, and angry. Many men avoided this fear by having a friend do the honors after they were of age, turning them before their Initiation. Or they had experience fooling around with men before they came of age. This would not trigger the chip to change them, but oddly it was happening a lot anyway. Somehow knowing they would one day like men encouraged people to experiment more and enjoy gay sex.

I drove myself. This wasn't exactly a milestone you invited your parents and friends to, although for some unfortunate reason, spectators were allowed. If they missed it, it didn't matter. Everyone's Initiation was videotaped and made publicly available, although it was shot from the front and took in the whole room, so it wasn't as invasive as a full blown porn movie at least. This was just another way we had the privilege of submitting to the power of the State.

There was one facility for this per district, similar to voting precincts. Remote areas had mobile units in semitrailers and were not as convenient for the administrators or the participants. I entered the facility and signed in. This was done via fingerprints and some kind of matching to the chip in my brain; I didn't have to ever lift a pen or show identification. I then went into a holding area with the other Initiates. I was impressed. It was a nice lounge, and pretty ladies served us alcoholic beverages. There were a couple of large televisions broadcasting sporting events. There was no administrator in the room, just Initiates and the wait staff. There was only the door to get in and one on the other side to get out, and I knew there would be guards on the other side of either door.

We mingled and chatted, but everyone was nervous. I knew three of the other Initiates from school, but not well. I hated that policy allowed us to be put together like this. I managed to finish one drink before we were told to pass through the door on the other side. I entered a nice locker room, and we were told by a voice through the PA system to remove all our clothes and wait. The lockers each had an LED screen, and our names were temporarily assigned. The locker number would also be our station number when we got to the next room.

The room was small enough where we could see each other after we got naked, and I know the people running this show intentionally left us standing there for a while just to get used to being naked around other men. Naturally, we sized each other up. I wasn't the tallest or the most fit, but I did have defined abs, and my penis appeared to be the biggest in the room. I knew I had size anyway, because women had told me this. But I felt stupid for taking joy in this. Size didn't make the man, and soon we would all be bent over anyway.

Some of the guys looked uncomfortable around other nude men. At least half were overweight and borderline obese, and I knew these boys hadn't spent much time in the school locker room for athletic practice like I had.

Soon we were herded through the next single door. It was time. I knew what to expect, because the ritual hadn't changed in about fifty years. The sentry told us to go to our assigned station. Mine was number three. My lucky number. How ironic. The room was brightly lit and spacious. There were about twenty stations in a neat row. Light day, I thought to myself. There were only twelve of us. At each station was something resembling a gymnastic horse, but on a smaller scale. We would soon lean over this apparatus with our legs spread and feet touching the ground. Our torso would run along the length of the padded, slender platform, and our head would rest at the top. For now we each stood centered at the head of each station. Four women, the same that had served us drinks, came around and ensured we were standing with our feet a little more than shoulder width apart. They pointed our toes slightly in, then we each heard a small buzzing sound and light appeared in the tile below our feet. Suddenly my feet were held in place by an invisible force, and I knew I couldn't move them no matter how strong I was.

A guy two stations over started cursing and flailing his arms, saying he wasn't going to do it. I thought he was an idiot. He knew this would happen, so if he was going to pitch a fit and be a rebel, why not do it in the locker room or just not show up? He settled down after about thirty seconds of looking foolish. The guy to my left was a nice looking fellow I didn't know. He rolled his eyes at me, and we exchanged a nervous smile.

There was a door in front of each station. Above that a second story room with panoramic windows overlooked the Initiates. I didn't see anybody I knew. You had to be an adult to witness the ceremony. I saw at least a couple women, then a few young men, then the rest older men. A voice came over the PA system again. "I will read a brief statement from our Governor, John West. 'Gentlemen, thanks for being here today. Congratulations on meeting the qualifications for becoming an adult and citizen of your country. Today you've chosen make a sacrifice to demonstrate your love of country and help us maintain a strong population. I thank you, and I hope you enjoy your Initiation.'"

Nice spin, I thought. We weren't exactly here by choice.

The announcer came on again. "If any woman would like to claim one of these men as her mate, please do so now."

This was the last chance for us to not be turned into homosexuals for the rest of our lives. Women chose who to marry now. Since they were about eleven percent of the population from my age group and there were twelve Initiates, I expected maybe one person to get claimed. A woman could claim in person or via remote request online.

Two minutes went by. Nothing. Where was Beth? She was one of my lovers and closest friends. She had hinted that she might claim me, but that was weeks ago. That was before our fights. I hung my head in despair. It had been my fault. I had to go and cheat and fuck other women. Stupid. Finally I heard a door open. But it wasn't for me, it was station seven. I knew the guy. He was overweight, completely unpopular, and yet here was a lady coming to get him. But I also knew he came from a good family and always scored high grades. It was love, or it was her marrying well. Who knows. I recognized the lady from two years ahead of me in school. She wasn't very attractive, but she was smart, and my fellow Initiate now had a good mate. His foot restraints immediately deactivated. They smiled, kissed, and quickly left out the same door they entered.

"Initiates, please move into position and prepare to submit." The women came around again to help. I leaned over my station, my balls pressed against the cushion, and slowly rested my head and let my arms dangle. A lady came by and adjusted something on the wall behind me, raising mine a couple inches so my knees were only slightly bent. Then my hands, even though still a foot off the floor, were suddenly frozen by that force again. I was bent over, my ass presented, unable to move my hands or feet.

"Volunteers, please enter", the announcer said after all of us were in our positions of submission.

Doors opened, and in they came, one for each station. Unlike us, these were not a random cross section of men. You had to apply for this position, and certain levels of fitness and youth were expected. They stood just inside the door, each about ten paces away from their assigned stations. They paused there for a minute, perhaps to let us get a good look at our conquerors. I was shocked to see the only black man in the room was assigned as my volunteer! What a stroke of bad luck. In our racist society, it was considered even more humiliating if a black man performed your Initiation.
Fitting in nicely with the stereotype, I could tell my Volunteer's penis was bigger than all the other ones in front of us. They were all in various stages of arousal, some fully hard. Mine was flaccid, but it was still obvious he was the biggest. The guy at station 8 had a full boner flat against his belly, but my Volunteer's cock hanging between his legs was thicker and longer. His body was flawlessly muscular, and his entire pubic region was shaved. I did not relish the idea of taking the biggest cock in the room in my ass. The race didn't bother me. I just worried what others would think. I knew none of my fellow Initiates would trade places with my unlucky ass right now.

As they approached, I took a closer look at my Volunteer. I was shocked. I knew him. The same look of surprise crossed his face, and he stopped in his tracks. Neither of us said anything for two seconds, and then he proceeded, coming to my side and putting a hand on my shoulder. He leaned in and spoke close to my ear. "It's your call, I'll tell them if you want."

Things were less rigid after the Volunteers entered. They interacted with their Initiates and talked, the Initiates just couldn't move much. They were at the mercy of Volunteers. So it was normal for my Volunteer to talk to me, but he did it quietly because it was against regulation for a Volunteer to know his Initiate. This was strange considering anyone could be a spectator, and we could know other Initiates. I guess the government wanted to at least not make us be molested by someone we knew. That was probably a good thing. I knew I only had seconds to decide, so I just nodded slightly. My silence told Lamar to proceed covertly and break the rules. "I'll take care of you," he said.

Lamar was a year older than me, and we had been neighbors and friends through middle school and the early part of high school. We were friends because our parents didn't tell us black and white people couldn't be friends. We had each others backs and knew each other so well. But he had left the neighborhood a couple years before. I didn't know why, but I knew it wasn't for good reasons. We never spoke again. I suppose amid this stressful ritual, I just preferred a friend do it to me, but also someone I didn't have to see again every day. Lamar was perfect, minus the gigantic cock I had to somehow accept into my body.

"Why couldn't you have a little dick?" I joked. He laughed.

He massaged my shoulders for a minute, then ran a hand down my back until one finger pressed just at the top of my crack. Then he patted my butt cheek and squeezed gently. "You look good," he offered. "I'm attracted to you. I'm sorry you don't have these urges yet."

Lamar had been taking care of himself. He was chiseled and had grown a lot. I estimated him to be about six feet and three inches tall, a few inches taller than me now. He was always smart, and despite today's racist attitudes, I could understand how he had gotten a job, been successful, and been chosen to be a Volunteer. Then he was gone from my field of view, behind me now to take his prize.

I felt him gently pull my cheeks apart. I was already pretty exposed, but this made my hole even more accessible. I felt the breeze more in my most sacred spot, and I shivered with nervous energy. Then he let me go, and one hand rested on my bum. I could look backwards just a little, and he stood to the side slightly so I could see him. He was pumping his cock, and I saw it grow even more until he was fully hard. It was impressive, and it scared the hell out of me. "Oh god," I said and nervously laughed.

"You got this no problem," he said.

I saw Lamar lube up. He was generous with the stuff, then he squirted some of it at the top of my crack and let it ooze down into the relevant part of my anatomy. I felt a finger between my cheeks, and he pressed against my hole and ensured the area was coated. I knew that he was not allowed to finger me or do any sort of foreplay like that, nor was he permitted to have me give him oral stimulation. It was supposed to be a quick deal. Come in, lube up, fuck me, cum inside me, and leave.

I looked to my left and a few people were already getting fucked. The guy who had erupted in cursing earlier was doing that shit again, and I watched with mild amusement as his Volunteer, wielding one of the smaller cocks in the room, easily shoved his cock in and began fucking him hard. The Initiate immediately stopped struggling once he was impaled and just laid there, spent and defeated. Another Initiate was complaining now while already getting fucked, whining about the pain. I wanted to yell at him to shut up, because his complaints were distracting. Admit it, move on, and be a man about it. There's nothing you can do, so just endure two minutes of discomfort.

Then he was there. A large, blunt object pressed directly against my butthole. He just held it there for a while, in no rush. A gentle push. It did nothing except push my entire anus in. He repeated it several times with the same result. Then he got the tip in, just enough to open the outside of the hole a bit, but the muscles inside were clamped shut. Lamar took his time, and each rocking of his hips opened me a bit more. Now the tip was pressing and opening my muscles a little, but the head was not fully inside. I could feel how wide his head was even through it wasn't in yet, and I began to stretch and burn. "Too big, no way it will go." I muttered.

"It will, trust me," he coached me. I looked around. The guy next to me began to groan, and I saw that his Volunteer was trying hard to insert his penis. The Initiate appeared to be clenching up and trying to stop him, but his fight was hopeless. His legs and hands were pinned, and his feet were turned inward a bit, making it even harder to clench his cheeks together. Sure enough, his struggle ended and the sex began moments later.

I looked to the other side, and it seemed I was the last person to start. All the other Initiates where deflowered and on their way to insemination. As if reading my mind, the faceless announcer said, "Let's go, number three. Begin copulation."

Lamar leaned down and said to me softly, "I'm going to penetrate now. The first push is the hardest."

It really burned now. I had opened wide all the way around his head finally. He paused for a second to let me contemplate my fate, but Lamar was eager to finish the conquest. He slid in without much difficulty now that I was breached. His cock drove in deep. "Aaaaahh," I moaned softly as my body opened up to him and for the first time to anyone.

He immediately pulled his cock back, slapping my ass rather hard on the withdrawal. "Whoah, slip that right in there," he said. He left the head inside me and drove forward again, this time all the way until I felt his thighs against my cheeks. His gigantic cock was balls-deep, and my days as a backdoor virgin were behind me. I felt something weird and unexpected amid my humiliation. Was it pride? I had taken the largest dick in the room no problem. I mean, it hurt like hell, but I had done it.

He rested inside me for a bit before proceeding. "That feels amazing," he said. Then he began to tunnel in and out. He was slow at first. I could sense his skill as a lover. He was in control, and the pace and range of motion were consistent. Every withdrawal ended with the head of his cock wedged between the tight muscles at the front. Every thrust ended with him buried to the hilt with his hips flattening my ass cheeks. He finished the thrust in a gentle manner, not pounding into me and damaging anything.

"Insemination on station seven," the announcer said. I didn't know the announcer would tell everyone when each individual act was complete. But I looked over, and sure enough his Volunteer looked spent, leaning over his Initiate for a moment before pulling his cock out.

I was still fighting Lamar, but I couldn't help it. My body was on autopilot. I had no experience relaxing, so my muscles clamped down and held his cock tightly in a futile effort to expel it. This continued for at least the first few minutes. A few other stations were announced as complete. Lamar was taking his time. I sensed he could climax faster. Why was he dragging this out? But I knew the answer. It was the same as me with a woman. He wanted it to last longer because he was enjoying it.

That voice again. Two more stations were complete, their Initiates inseminated, their minds turning towards a permanent change in sexual orientation.

The act I was enduring didn't feel right, and it was humiliating, and it hurt the entire time. But a transformation overcame me about five minutes into my Initiation. Lamar was fucking me harder now, but the pain wasn't as bad. Finally, my body began to respond as it should. It must have been completely obvious to Lamar that I was a virgin. I could not relax and let him in easily. It wasn't that I was nervous, it's just I didn't know how. But now I could fell my internal muscles better and realized to a certain extent that I could control them. I did a kegel movement a couple times and felt myself squeeze him tighter. I bore down on him like I was trying to expel him and realized this actually relaxed everything and let him enter me easier also. I felt the muscles reflexively fire and try to contract against his intrusion, and I was able to concentrate hard and turn them off almost completely.

The change was noticeable. "There you go, you're getting the hang of it, buddy." Lamar said. He began to fuck me harder. I felt most of the internal resistance gone now. His hands gripped firmly at my hips, and I heard the smacking sound as his hips flattened my butt cheeks now at a faster pace.

He kept encouraging me, saying great things about how my ass felt to him with occasional dominant slaps to my behind. That feeling of odd pride grew. I didn't want to do this act to begin with, but at least I was apparently doing okay at it. Maybe I didn't know anything about fucking a man, but my dedication to fitness was paying off to appeal to him. Being a good friend to him was paying off perhaps with his ability to connect with me emotionally. I was fucking better now and had control over how at least I responded to him, and the coupling was working well. I was cooperating, and it didn't feel like a rape even though I didn't have a choice in my submission. The humiliation at being taken by a big-dicked black man was turning into pride as I watched my lame fellow initiates whine next to me as they were plundered with smaller units. I also remember how unfairly Lamar was treated growing up, and undoubtedly today also. I was glad to help lift him up by having him be the one to do my Initiation. I was glad I didn't deny him.

I realized for the first time in my life I enjoyed submitting to someone else's control, even if I would prefer it to be with a woman. Being forced to do it took away my uncertainty and opened my mind. It was good to let go. In and out he probed. He gripped my hips assertively, and I felt my whole body move as he pulled me in to meet each powerful forward thrust. His cock was doing something inside me now; stimulating something deep in me that was feeling good. I couldn't deny it. My cock was rubbing the horse now as he moved me to and fro. I suddenly realized I was erect. I was enjoying this!

Then it ended abruptly. He left his cock buried in me all the way for a few seconds without moving. Then he pressed it in even harder, his hips flattening my ass cheeks. He was leaning over more, and I felt his breath on the back of my neck and heard his grunts. I couldn't feel his fluids inside me, but I knew it was happening. I assumed his loads were proportionate to his testicular size, and my insides were likely being flooded.

Then he was still, his cock left inserted. I looked around and realized Lamar was the last person to cum. The room was silent now. Everyone was spent and defeated. They had to rest in position for a certain amount of time to ensure quality fertilization. "The Event has happened," Lamar said softly. I just nodded. "That was amazing. You honor me by choosing me to perform this service. There's more I want to say, but I can't do it here. Come see me after your change when you're ready and let's talk," he said. I didn't fell like I had any choice at all in the matter and thought it was strange that he said I honored him, but I guess since I could have raised the flag that I knew him and got a different, whiter Volunteer, I did sort of choose that at least.

"Station three complete," came the loud voice.

I felt his cock slowly pull out. Something squishy followed him out and dropped to my scrotum. I wondered if it was lube or semen. Then he was gone, out the way he came, leaving me with the rest of the men still locked to our stations. I rested my head and wondered what kinds of changes were already beginning inside me. So far I felt the same. A few more minutes went by, then a couple workers came in with hoses and started spraying us off from behind. The entire room was built like a bath house, with a tile floor leaning slightly to strategically placed drains. Lubricant and various bodily fluids were sprayed off of us and then off the floor, as if to wash away evidence that this terrible ritual had ever happened. It hurt when they hosed me down. My balls had been wedged underneath and behind me somehow in Lamar's final thrusting, and it wasn't exactly a low-pressure jolt of water.

The announcer started up again, congratulating us on going through the ritual. The invisible binds were suddenly gone, and we were free to stand. There were no guards anymore, just the ladies handing out towels. We were told we were free to go back to the locker room and leave at our leisure. We weren't treated as prisoners anymore, just regular people. And why not? The government had imposed its will on us already. A cascade of physiological changes had started in our bodies, and there was nothing we could do to stop it now.

The exact mechanism of what was happening inside me was not publicly known. Chemical receptors of some kind at the cellular level in me were bathed in his semen and sent signals to my brain. The chip located in my frontal lobe somewhere was programmed to send messages to my brain as long as this happened when I was of age, beginning a physical transformation inside my head that would turn me gay. The changes would begin immediately, although I would be able to function normally and might not notice anything. The changes would accelerate and be "hardened off" and made permanent by first sleep.

I didn't spend more time than was necessary at the facility. Everything felt loose "down there," but I wasn't dripping anything after whatever had oozed out already with Lamar's final withdrawal. My muscles seemed to have closed off enough. I desperately wanted to go to the bathroom and eliminate the semen from my body, but that urge was trumped by my desire to leave the place of my Initiation as soon as possible and put the experience behind me.

I took my time getting dressed and thought all the other men had left, but then I heard a subdued greeting and turned to see the man that has been at the station next to me. He followed that up with, "Can I ask you something?"

I nodded warily, and he continued, more enthusiastic now. "Did you go through the change before today? You were doing a great job of taking that fat cock, and you seemed to like it."

I gave him a cold look. "No." I thought it was inappropriate for him to be talking to me at all at a time when we needed space, especially about this. But I cut him some slack, since he had gone though it as well, and everyone dealt with stress differently. "He was very skilled. He made it so it wasn't that bad."

"Sorry," he said. "I thought for sure. I was bred three weeks ago by a friend that I trusted. It made today so easy."

"You enjoyed it?" I asked. Now I was genuinely curious.

"It was fun. But my guy was, you know," he said and paused, extending his pinky finger. He was complaining that his Volunteer had a little dick. "I'd have given anything to be getting plowed by that handsome, hung stud that you got. I've wanted to try a black guy for a long time, you just don't get the chance for that often. You are so lucky." Then he was gone before I could tell him that I would have loved to have received a smaller penis.

At home, my parents didn't even talk to me; I just got a loving nod. They sensed I needed my space. It took several trips to the bathroom, and even then I wasn't sure if all the viscous fluid had been purged. I had weird feelings of anger and revulsion at myself, but they slowly faded over the next few hours. I took a long shower, and then admired myself in the mirror. I took a closer than usual look at my penis. I was always happy with it, because while not as huge as Lamar, I was well above average. But now I admired not only the size, but enjoyed looking at the shape also, and I enjoyed just feeling it in my hand. I had a nice semi going, not hard, but it still felt full in my hand.

I admired my physique from the front for a few minutes, appreciating how I looked and all the hard work that went into that. I turned and looked at my ass. The muscles were full and strong; I definitely didn't have a feminine look. My butt changed shape slightly as my stance chanced, the muscles rippling beneath the surface. The sides had concave spots when I flexed from all my strength training and other athletics. I spread and bent over just a little, and I could barely see the hole concealed within my muscular cheeks. I wasn't put off or anything like I normally would be. I was drawn to it, and felt a weird attraction to my butt. I was confused. I knew the change had begun at this point. I had an urge to step out of my own body and sink my cock into my ass. I wondered hopefully if I would lean toward being a "top" as most converts did. I viewed that as less of a departure from my previous state.

I added a bit more light and bent over in front of the full length mirror and took a better look at the tight hole between the cheeks for the first time in my life. I spread and noticed the cute, crinkled flesh radiating outward from the hole in the middle. It seemed so small and tight, the lines converging into a tiny point. I couldn't believe Lamar's enormous rod had fit inside there. But as I looked closer and spread the cheek more, I noticed a thin, vertical line at the center. It opened a bit when I spread my cheeks, and I wondered if it looked that way before my African plowing. "Good job, buddy," I said as I remembered Lamar. I had certainly been fucked more thoroughly than most anal virgins. My butt was still a little sore, but I didn't feel loose anymore.

I awoke the next day feeling just about like any other day. The muscles at the entrance to my ass were a little sore, but like a hangover, the pain was gone by lunch time. Only my pride was hurt permanently. I had been taken against my will, a victim of state-sponsored homosexual rape. Oddly, my resentment over the incident was fading, and more surprisingly, I didn't care that it was. I didn't even think the experience was that bad now. Lamar did enjoy it, after all. What the hell is the matter with me? Where's the fire? I put the thought out of my mind.

I left my parents' house after lunch and headed over to Beth's. She had called in the morning in tears. We talked on her porch with semi-privacy as her dad mowed the yard. Single family homes were less common these days, and their family had to move pretty far from the city to afford the place.

"I can't believe it's done. Why did you let them do it? You know I wanted to be with you!"

I softly corrected her. "I didn't know. You've been upset with me." I didn't add that it was because I had been an asshole for a while now, and had slept with her friend, and not to mention a bunch of women that weren't her friends. That was all true. Now I felt shame and a bit of annoyance. There was a double standard here of course, but I didn't make the rules. Beth had been passed around a lot at school, adored by so many men with so few women to compete for attention. But she expected me to be loyal. But I wasn't only her favorite fuck. We'd been friends since we were in diapers. She had wanted to save me. She came back from vacation a day late. What was I to do now?
"And it's permanent?"

"You know the answer to that," I said.

"Do you feel... different?"

I looked closer at Beth and pondered it. She was gorgeous. Her eyes were engaging and beautiful. She wasn't captain of the cheerleading team, but instead she was always on the field or the court as the star, whether scoring goals or baskets. She was still a bit of a socially awkward nerd despite her athleticism, so she wasn't the most popular girl in school, but I had always thought she was the hottest. Many men had fucked her, and they all raved about not just her body, but also her skills and great personality. She really was the total package. The top she was wearing at that moment was not designed to show cleavage, but her breasts were large enough to force the issue. She had left off her bra, and she kept leaning down slightly, "accidentally" showing me most or all of her breasts. She had on her finest jeans to showcase her athletic ass. Her long black hair was styled nicely. She had paid attention to detail preparing for my visit.

Yet I felt no attraction for her. Something was definitely changing. I could tell she was beautiful; that part of my reasoning was left intact. But my hormones didn't respond to her like they normally did. As if to emphasize that, she reached across and rubbed my cock through my pants. Nothing. She cried softly. I noticed her father out of the corner of my eye and was relieved when Beth removed her hand from my crotch. But then I looked closer. I noticed Mr. Sandborn was quite fit considering he was pushing 50. He had some gray hair, but it made him look more mature to go with his good looks and nice build. I certainly had never noticed before. My eyes drifted to his crotch. He was wearing baggy shorts as he mowed the grass, but as he moved, the fabric folded and creased in different places, revealing the true contours and size of what was beneath. He was packing something big. Finally, my cock began to grow, but it wasn't because of Beth. I was embarrassed, and I muttered something about being sorry and bolted off.

Men traditionally got a week off of work or school after their Initiation. The next day was Sunday, and I spent it alone at home. I felt no anger like I thought I would. Instead I spent a lot of time touching myself, not getting off, just stroking gently and admiring. I spent more time looking in the mirror, appreciating my body and the hard work that went into making it look so good. I never really stopped to appreciate it before; I just made it look good so I could make other people like me.

I shaved down there, all around, for the first time, and I loved how my genitalia looked larger and more clean and enjoyable now. Most men did this I heard, but I had never bothered. Not only did it look good, it felt incredible. I loved how the smooth, bare flesh felt as I explored with my touch.

I knew what I had to do. There was only one person that would understand. As if my new urges weren't enough, the change also spiked your hormones for about a week, and I was feeling the effects. I needed some release. I sent the message from the chip inside my head to the display and gave it instructions. Lamar's face appeared a few seconds later. He appeared to be in his living room on a couch. He asked how I was doing. "It's happening for sure. I'd like to see you, what do you think?"

He smiled. "I was hoping you'd reach out to me. You want to come now?" I nodded. "Address on screen. I'll be here."

I parked a few blocks away from the high rise building Lamar lived in. I was in stealth mode. Being Initiated by a black man was thought by society to be more degrading, but at least it was out of my control. But voluntarily seeking out and having relations with a black man was very taboo and could really hurt my chances for promotions at work, ruin my social circles, and in general taint me forever. "Going black" was a kink, and one best kept to yourself. I thought this was blatantly unfair, but again, I didn't make the rules. It also seemed inexplicable given the fact that most black women chose white men as mates, and society accepted the women fine. But there was a darker reason lurking beneath that acceptance. Black was being bred out of the gene pool, and the black women that chose white mates were doing their part.

Fortunately, housing wasn't that segregated. I blended in well among the various inhabitants that I saw in the lobby and near the elevators. Lamar lived somewhere among the middle floors in a modest one-bedroom place. The building was quite dilapidated. Lamar had a good job, but the real estate market was tight due to overpopulation and diminishing housing resources.

I gave a soft knock as to not draw attention to myself. Lamar barely opened the door and motioned me in, sensitive to the situation and reserving his greeting until behind closed doors. Once in, I quickly took in my surroundings. While the building was old, he had gone to some trouble to ensure his place was tidy and modern, and I felt right at home. He put his arm on my shoulder and gave me a warm smile. "I'm glad you came," he said. "Can I get you a beer?"

"Definitely," I said. I was nervous, and the drink would help.

We settled on his couch. "Why don't we catch up a bit. It's been so long since I've seen you," I said.

We put down two beers each as we caught up. I hadn't seen Lamar for almost four years, and he told me about his other high school and brought me up to speed on his job. We did college on our own time these days, with a full time job commencing immediately with rare exception. We were workers for the State first to contribute to productivity, and we were students second to improve ourselves for better work.

Lamar's exit from my neighborhood was pretty rough it turns out. His was the only minority family in our entire building. He had no idea who donated the eggs and had been his biological mother, but two black men had raised him, and at least he was in a two-parent household. "You have no idea how much your friendship meant, you reaching across racial lines like that," he said.

"I didn't even think about that. We were younger," I replied. I could tell he meant it, and I realized I was looking into his eyes and connecting, as if this was a date. He was handsome and had a great build, and I knew I was attracted to him. I had always known he looked good, but it didn't move me before. Now I was drawn to him. I felt my cock jerk a little in my pants. I wasn't hard, but it was swelling and noticeable against my tight clothes. I didn't even realize until now I had my hand on his shoulder. We were sitting side by side on the couch, but I was turned to him, my knee pressed against his thigh.

There was a pause in the conversation after the last remarks, and I realized I was looking between his legs. He had been wearing a robe since I arrived, and it was parted and showing most of his legs. There was a shadow, and I peered to the side without realizing it to try to see into it and find his penis. He laughed.

"What are you looking for?" he teased playfully. Apparently small talk was over.

I paused for a while, not wanting to rush the sex talk or the act itself. Then I went on the offensive. "So, I mean, are you primarily a top? I guess so since you're a Volunteer."

"Yeah," he said.

This was an important and common question. With adult society almost all gay now, coupling was not an issue. We dated, we loved, we did what any couple would do. But sexual compatibility was a whole different thing, and many struggled. I had read that years ago when people were gay only naturally, most leaned towards the bottom. But something in the way the program in the chip acted on your brain, most men adopted the traditional role of their heterosexual past, which meant basically they did the insertion and weren't comfortable receiving anal. These men were versatile only to the extent it had to be done to make the relationship work.

He continued since I wasn't speaking up about my own desires. "Did you detect that I was a little bi-curious even before the Change?"

"No!" I said, genuinely surprised.

He nodded. "Don't get me wrong, I loved women too, and had a few of them back in the day. But it was you who first made me think."

"No way," I said.

"Maybe it was because you were a good friend. You were also so damn cute. But I definitely remember, back when I barely understand any of these urges, I definitely wanted to fuck you." I knew I was turning red; I couldn't help it. But this was the new me, and I was flattered knowing I had turned him on. "I am about eighty twenty," he continued, meaning eighty percent top. "I actually only practice as a top. I only got fucked once, which was my Initiation," he said. "And he was tiny." He laughed. "I can't imagine what you went through."

"You're a big boy," I assured him, smiling. "I'm good now, but I was sore even through this morning."

The reminder of my Initiation, which as it was for everyone was against my will, darkened the mood for a moment. "How are you, are you okay?"

That was an open-ended question. I knew what he meant. Was I upbeat or depressed? Did he have to hurt me then, and did I still hurt now? Was I angry with him? "I'm good," I said, and gave him a sincere smile. "It had to be done. I'm not angry at anyone now. And by the way, it's working. I'm very turned on by you," I said.

"Can you be more specific? I'd receive for you," he said. "In fact, I'd bottom for you, but probably nobody else. You're not just another guy. I think I'd even like it, and you deserve it if it's what you want."

I knew he was putting himself out there now. But I also knew he was an alpha male, and a natural top. But I decided to play off this a bit. "Well, I don't know. Let's see it, show me your butt," I said. "I only saw your front the other day."

Lamar paused just for a second, then seemed very happy at the idea of showing his body. I remained on the couch to observe, and he stood in front of me, then faced away. He hiked his robe up over his butt, leaning over just slightly. The ass in front of me was perhaps as good as it could get. He was very fit like me, and that combined with his exotic, dark complexion appealed to me greatly. "Very nice," I said. "Turn, please."

He faced me and stepped forward into my personal space, his crotch only a foot or so away. I looked up at him and grinned, then eagerly pulled the drawstring to his robe and watched it fall open and to the sides.

The unit in front of me gave off a sense of immense power and manhood. He was so big, even when he wasn't aroused. The area was heavily manicured, shaved bare to emphasize his size. There was no stubble. He had even shaved since he fucked me two days before. I felt so lucky to have this opportunity to enjoy it. I'm not sure how I hadn't noticed during my Initiation, but Lamar was uncircumcised. He was starting to swell, but his penis still hung down and was flaccid. The foreskin completely covered the large head. This was definitely a sign of being in the lower class. In our society, it was a sign of humanity's primitive beginnings. But I loved it and thought it was a beautiful work of art. It only made me want to fuck him more. The same cock that had already bred me was still intact as nature had intended.

I couldn't hide my enthusiasm as I reached out and gently clasped the shaft. It was so warm and full. He filled my hand with extra length on top of and below my grip, and he wasn't even hard. I pumped it gently twice, enjoying the feel of the extra skin sliding up and down the shaft. Then I pushed my grip to the base, retracting his foreskin and exposing the brown head. I was suddenly hungry for him. This urge was almost uncontrollable. I leaned down, opening wide to take the head into my mouth. I slid down the shaft greedily, moving my hand at the right time to take as much into my mouth as possible. Already there was too much length for me to handle, and I couldn't get him all the way in. I held him there for a few seconds, and each beat of his heart pumped more blood into the hardening shaft.

I cupped his balls with the other hand as I slid my grip up and down. He rested his hand on my head and moaned his approval. In four strokes, he was up. The head was spongy and the skin to the shaft soft, but I felt the rock hard member beneath. His erection quality was superb. His balls felt heavy in my hand compared with what I was used to. It was more evidence of his potency. His smell was neutral with a slight must to it. I had no idea what that smell even really was until I had Lamar in my mouth, then it all made sense. My lips smacked as I let the unit flop out of my mouth. I smiled at him. I suddenly felt very aware of my butt. I clenched the muscles guarding my hole, and I felt something tingle inside me. Perhaps it was an itch, created by my subconscious mind as it dealt with new cravings and sensed nearby what would satisfy them. I felt empty. I desperately needed him inside me.

Lamar didn't say anything. He was being respectful and letting me sort things out in my head at my own pace. But everything was clear now, and I understood my purpose. I was both surprised and happy. "I didn't know for sure until you whipped it out, but now I am a hundred percent sure of my desires." Lamar was smiling and letting me finish, but he already knew. "I want to submit to you. Will you fuck me again?" I hated labels. But I was definitely a bottom.

Lamar adjusted his shoulders a bit, and the over-sized robe slid off. He was completely naked now, and I enjoyed seeing his entire muscular frame, including his flat stomach and those broad shoulders. "Bedroom," he said. I nodded.

I already had my shoes off, and the rest of my clothes came off quickly. I really wanted to be naked, but it still felt weird. We had been friends growing up, not lovers. The only time we had seen each other naked, we were being forced. I was being forced. He wanted to fuck me. But Lamar's encouragement helped, especially when my briefs came off. "Nice look," he said when he saw that I had shaved it bare.

"It looked so good on you, I had to try," I said.

Lamar steered me to the bed. I was an inexperienced lover, at least with men, so he took charge. He said he wanted to pamper me a bit since I didn't get any foreplay at my Initiation. I was face down on the bed, and Lamar spent a few minutes giving me a nice massage, starting with my tense shoulders, then moving to the lower back. He skipped my butt, opting for my legs before finally massaging my cheeks. His compliments about my body, in particular my butt, really helped. None of my female lovers from high school had objectified me this way, and it felt great since the words were positive.

He pulled the cheeks apart a couple times, and I knew he was examining my nest between them. But he made no move to take it to the next level. "Turn over," he said. He added a large pillow under my tush, and I spread my legs slightly, ready for him to fuck me. But Lamar was going to make me wait.

He smiled as he stayed to my side and gripped my cock and began pumping it slowly. I was already semi-hard, and his stroking got me to full mast in seconds. "I really like your dick," he said. "Nice look and a great size."

"Not quite as big as yours," I said.

He laughed. "This is actually the biggest one besides my own that I've touched. You're bigger than any men I've been with, even the black guys."

"Don't be racist," I joked.

I moaned as Lamar transferred my penis to his other hand and used the first to cup my balls gently. I relaxed my head on the other pillow. Clearly he was in no rush. Finally, the hand on my balls began to explore lower, finger tips pressing against my perineum. I spread my legs and lifted them, bending them back at the knee. I felt my hole exposed to cool air, completely spread for him. I reached between my legs and pushed his hand gently lower, smiling. I felt a finger press against the hole. My body tingled in response. My cock jerked and hardened a bit more. He left it there, teasing me, smiling. Then it was gone, and Lamar pulled a bottle of lube from his bedside drawer. He put a couple drops of the thick liquid on his middle finger, then returned it to between my legs. It was cool at first, and I felt him slowly working the pad of the finger in a circular motion to warm the gel and spread it.

I felt the forward pressure. He stopped when he felt my tight muscles, the tip already in a bit. He paused, then I felt myself relax, and he pushed the entire digit in my butt. I grunted and closed tight around him.

"So tight," he said. "That's what did it for me yesterday. I could barely hold my load from the first thrust." His finger began to slowly tunnel in and out. Today was very different from yesterday, I could already tell. My muscles relaxed quickly, and the probing felt very good. "You're learning. You opened for me and didn't fight it."

I nodded. "I'm very willing today, that's for sure." A few minutes went by as Lamar let me get used to penetration on my own terms this time. I appreciated that so much. After a while, I was dying to have more size. He added more lube, and this time inserted two fingers in me and stroked my rock hard cock again with his free hand. Precome appeared at the tip. He curled his fingers a bit, going for my prostate maybe, and then to my surprise he lowered his head and took my cock in his mouth. I almost spewed my load right there! I could have released if I'd wanted to, and I was grateful that I had good control over my ejaculation. He just gave me two bobs of the head, then looked up and smiled. "I almost came," I said. I love how this feels."

"Do you want more?" he asked.

I gazed from his confident smile down to the beautiful hunk of meat between his legs. I reached over and clasped the hard member again. "I want this," I said.

"Perfect. Do you want to ride me to start, so you can control the insertion? I'm going to take my time and fuck you right."

I did, and soon Lamar was on his back, with me in control this time. I took the bottle of lube and applied it generously to his entire length. I climbed aboard, straddling the powerful man and feeling his thick unit pressed against the bottom side of mine, our balls intermingling. I knew the slippery gel was spreading to my cheeks and all over, but neither of us cared. I was dying to fuck him, but once I was on top and knew I was going to get what I wanted, I wasn't in a rush. I took my time running my hands along his chest and muscles, looking into his handsome face. None of this stuff would have meant anything to me days before, yet today I noticed.

I hadn't considered how I might ride someone's cock before and wasn't sure of the position, but the correct way to do it turned out to be instinctual. Instead of lifting my whole body up to the top of his long penis, I adjusted my body forward and reached around to clasp the large unit just behind the head. God, he felt huge. I was impressed I was able to take him the day before. Were it not for that, I would have been very apprehensive. I only had to lift the member slightly, angled towards my front, and I pushed my butt back to meet him.

It was cool to see his face this time while he entered me instead of me being bent over and helpless. I fitted him at my entrance and pushed back. Unlike the day before, this time I was a little warmed up, and the tip slipped right in and began to open my muscles. It would still take some work to get around the impossibly large head though. I rocked back and forth, similar to how he did when he took my virginity. On the fifth or so push back, the head was almost in. I stopped this time and waited a few seconds, then bore down hard and pushed, opening around him fully. Stretching. Burning as my ass protested. But it wasn't as bad as last time. I was learning, and I knew I could do this. He moaned, his cock-head fully enveloped and squeezed by the tightest part of me.
But I didn't descend and take him into my body. I let the head plop out again. I felt in control, a bottom, but dictating everything. I wanted to tease him. He groaned in frustration as his cock slapped his belly. I was smiling though, and he knew something was up. I reached back and brought his cock to my hole again, feeling the tip slip inside just a bit. I held him there. I spoke softly to him. "They say there are two types of Volunteers, those that like taking men against their will, and those that do it more for the Initiates, making it as easy as possible on them. Which are you?"

He sensed I didn't want bullshit, and I wouldn't judge him. "Both," he said.

"You like seeing the virgins tremble, their bodies unable to cope with your size? They don't want it, but you fuck them anyway, forcing this big cock into them?"

"Yes."

"Did you feel that way about me?" I bore down and took his head fully again and released him, but I kept him close this time, my weight holding his cock on target. "Did it turn you on to fuck me, to break in another virgin, breed him, and make him want you forever?"

"Yes," he said. "When I saw it was you, I was dying to Initiate you. And I sure as hell didn't want anyone else doing it. I'd wanted to fuck you for a long time and knew I could do it better than anyone. If you had turned me away, I would have been so disappointed. Why did you let me do it? You could have had someone you didn't know, someone with a smaller dick."

I paused before answering. My ass still teased the head, refusing to allow more of him inside me. We both were dying to feel the coupling; his cock filling me, my warmth embracing him. But I held off, and he didn't complain. The longer it took for me to slide down his cock, the better it would be for us both. I moved closer and leaned into him, whispering almost as our faces are closer. "My family is rich. I'm white. Did that turn you on more? Did that help you enjoy it when you deflowered me with that giant cock, then spanked me." I smiled to let him know we could be open about our fantasies and prejudices, whichever came into play.

"Yes. You?" he replied.

I nodded. "If I'm what you wanted, then you deserved it."

"You don't think less of me?" he asked, knowing the answer.

I just smiled and shook my head no, enjoying the sensations in my ass as I opened around his head again, this time ready to take him. I was so glad he had been the one to Initiate me and that he loved doing it so much. He respected me and cared for my well-being as my old best friend, that I knew. But he also desired me immensely, not just my mind, but my physical form. There was a darkness and lust that drove him with me, and knowing he couldn't be denied, that he had taken me for his pleasure because it's what he wanted and the law permitted it, indeed was a huge turn on for me. I leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the lips, the only one we'd have that day. I felt it an appropriate way to begin the sex.

The last time I had been fucked, as soon as Lamar was at this point, he drove it home, perhaps to get the discomfort over with as soon as possible. Not this time. I wanted to feel every millimeter of his penetration and savor it. I pushed back slowly, transferring my hand from his cock back to the bed in front when he was lodged firmly inside and I knew it wouldn't fall out. Every depth of insertion brought different sensations. It felt slightly different when the head was just about to pry me apart versus when I was completely dilated around him. Then he slid in further, the large cock pulling my flesh in with it for a second before I got my equilibrium and let him pass. Further in he went, and even though I had less sensitivity past my tight entrance, I felt the head push its way in and open each inch of me.

I looked into his eyes and enjoyed the unmistakable look of pleasure on his face as his cock was enveloped by my tight squeeze. I'm sure he saw right into my soul and knew what I was feeling: a desperate need to be filled and be one with him, but still overwhelmed at the monumental task of taking all of him. I was grimacing, but this was one of the most amazing moments of my life.

Almost there. It felt stuck. I leaned a little more upright, gave it a slight wiggle, and pushed again. Success. My butt rested on his thighs. I'd conquered all of him. I rested for a second. I wanted to be open to him. This was my purpose now; he needed to fit comfortably.

This wasn't just kinky sex. The man beneath me mattered. He wasn't just anyone. He was the guy I grew up with. I had his back and he had mine. He was the one that broke me and made me ready for this moment. I resisted an urge to kiss him again. The transformation in my head was completing, but I just wasn't ready for that level of intimacy. It would come in time. I settled for lowering my torso slightly and putting my hand behind his head to be closer to his handsome face. I began to lift off him, loving the sensation of his cock pulling out of me. I didn't let him escape, skillfully lowering myself when the head got near my entrance. I didn't want to have to shut and open the door completely again until I was stretched out more.

The rhythm was very slow at first. It wasn't like last time, but it was still uncomfortable to have him in me. His cock was so big, he dilated me more than I was naturally designed. But I also loved the overstuffed feeling, which added to the mental thrill of my submission to him. And it was a different kind of hurt now. I viewed it simply as a sign of welcomed surrender, a sign of giving my body to him to use as he saw fit. He belonged inside me, and I'd sacrifice to get him there.

Already it was working. I was relaxing, and my motions were becoming easier. I lifted a little higher now, amazed at how much sensitivity I had near the front of my tunnel. I seemed to be able to feel every contour of his head as he passed between my tight muscles, almost all the way out, but not quite. Then I pushed back just a little. There was enough relaxation now where I could experiment. I contracted my muscles, embracing the sensitive area just behind the head. He moaned. "Is this good for you? I know I'm going slow still," I asked.

His thoughts mirrored mine perfectly. "Hell yes. Your ass feels amazing, and I can feel it better this way."

I picked up the pace a little now. It was starting to feel really good. The dull ache would never leave, but it was overpowered by pleasure and only turned me on more anyway. I wasn't even thinking about my own penis until Lamar clasped it. I was still fully hard. He pumped it slowly, and I emitted something between a groan and a joyous laugh.

It wasn't just front and back now. I gyrated my hips in a circular motion. I alternated with my torso close to his then straight up. I loved feeling him spear me at different angles, each bringing with it slightly different pleasure. I'd seen a few drops of precome from my own cock now, and I knew if I let myself, I would spew all over him. I needed to hold back. We weren't even close to being done.

I reached up to grab his headboard then moved off my knees to instead squat with my feet pressed on the bed. I continue to ride him, but now I worked my muscles more, squeezing him at what I thought were the right times as he probed me. He didn't say anything, he just nodded. I knew it was working. Our experience seemed to last forever, but I knew it had only been a few minutes. I went back to my knees, straddling him. I leaned forward and put my head next to his, enjoying that manly smell as I let him rest inside me for a moment.

I felt like a bottom; that's what I knew my calling was to be. But I had my needs, and I wasn't scared to make demands. I turned slightly, speaking in a whisper since I was right next to his ear. "Take me like you did yesterday. Hard. I'm ready for it." I leaned up slightly, looking into his eye now.

He nodded. "Definitely." In his first big display of strength, he grabbed my hips and lifted my muscular body off his cock and led me to a spot next to him on the bed. "On the floor. Face that mirror," he said.

I complied eagerly and didn't have to wait long. Lamar was behind me, and this time his penis plunged balls-deep without any resistance. I immediately fell in love with the full-length mirror in front of me. Both of us were men and therefore turned on visually, and it was so erotic to see my face in sexual bliss and surrender, while the powerful man behind me, glistening in sweat and rock hard muscles, plowed me.

It was doggie style, just like my defloration, but this was so different. I was willing; a submissive but equal partner. Not in the shock of being in chains and it being my first time, now I noticed more detail. Lamar changed his angle and tempo as the sex wore on. I was amazed at how he gripped my hips and seemed to effortlessly move me. I was well built and over 200 pounds, but I truly felt my lover was physically dominant. "I'm going to cum soon. You are too good at this," he said. "Where do you want me to finish?"

There was no question. Urges that didn't exist hours ago manifested themselves now with perfect clarity. "I want to taste you."

There was little background noise, so the loud "whap, whap" sounds of his hips slamming into my ass cheeks spoke to how hard and deep he was fucking me. He kept that up for a while, but then his tempo slowed. He said he was close. I felt more pressure at the bottom of my tunnel. He was pressing into me and down, slowly working the sensitive underside of his long cock. He began to pull out all the way with each stroke, pausing for a second before slowly boring back in. I was completely relaxed now, and I felt myself wide open after he pulled out, the air tickling me inside before he stuffed me full of cock again.

"Am I gaping?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, hugely," he said.

Other than his ejaculation later, I felt this was one of the best indicators of my submission to him. My body was ravaged and used, stretched so much by his huge size. I had learned through necessity how to relax my entrance like never before and open to my full potential. The muscles had been traumatized and tested, but I knew they would return stronger. I worried his presence would remain with me forever, my ass a loose and hanging open. But later with experience and more training I would learn the real truth: I was both looser when I needed to be and tighter when it mattered.

I acted. I wanted to finish him also on my terms, not as a passive recipient of his gift. I was more in tune with what I could control down there now, and I concentrated and was able to feel exactly where his head was throughout each thrust. I tried to time my contractions and give him extra stimulation when I thought he needed it, especially gripping his shaft in a fluttering movement when the top third of his cock passed my muscles. He was already close, but I helped him get over the top.

"Yep, that's the way," he said. "I can't hold it anymore. Turn now."

His cock slid out of my ass for the final time. Lamar had already adjusted his position from being on his knees while fucking me in doggie to standing and hovering over me for more power. When I turned to face him, his cock was already near my face as I stayed on my knees. I wasn't really sure what to do, so I just acted like any of my favorite porn stars and opened my mouth and stuck my tongue out while he gripped his cock in front of me. If he wanted to shove it in my mouth, that was fine. If he wanted to watch it splash on my face and into my mouth, that was fine too.

He opted for the latter. I was amazed at his control. I knew he was at his point of no return, but he seemed to not be in a rush. He confidently gripped his cock and brought it into position with the head just at the tip of my outstretched tongue. Then he pumped it slowly twice, and suddenly the first copious volley erupted out and hit the back of my mouth, coating the length of my tongue. I had no time to think before the next three spurts filled my mouth, angled slightly different as to coat my cheeks. The fluid rapidly pooled into my mouth, and I swallowed once to make room for more.

This was my first taste of semen. The smell was very strong, kind of like ammonia. The taste was totally different and more of a slightly sweet taste. I loved taking his load. It wasn't the taste so much as just the mental aspect of swallowing his essence, or finishing the job that I had started. I had done the work to coax out his load, so it was both my responsibility and privilege to receive it. I knew Lamar's load were proportionate to the size of his balls based on the amount that had been ejaculated into me during my Initiation, but it sure seemed like more of it when I was swallowing him.

He pushed the penis a little further so the large head was just outside my lips as he finished convulsing. My tongue teased the ridge of the head on the bottom. The remaining spunk oozed out into my mouth as his pressure died down. Then he milked up the length, a final yellowish-white glob appearing at the slit on the tip. I sucked at the tip of his cock, twirling my tongue over the slit to bring the final emissions into my mouth. Then he backed up and smiled as I swallowed again. The load was a sticky mess inside my mouth. He left a sticky film everywhere. I knew I would taste him for a while after we parted, and that was just fine.

Lamar and I got back on the bed and relaxed for a while. We made small talk, enjoying the afterglow. I had kept my erection throughout the experience all the way up to the grand finale, and now it faded to a comfortable semi. After a few minutes while Lamar worked through his refractory period, he offered to get me off. I told him I needed a break, and wasn't sure I'd even need it.

Then I asked the question that had been in my heart for a while. "So what now? I mean, I know I can't hog you myself since you have other Initiations and are in demand in your personal life, but will I get a repeat fuck?"

"I hope so, because that ass gets better every time I tap it. Well, did you enjoy it?" he asked rhetorically.

"Yeah. I can't imagine anyone doing me better. You owned me. You were thorough, and oh my god you are so big! Nobody else can fill me like that, and that is what I want every time now. Every man that goes after you will be a let down. The bar is set too high."

He laughed. "It might not seem like it here, but you're the one in demand. Nowadays there are more guys like me and less good bottoms like you. And you're the best one I've fucked."

"Bullshit," I said, a little bit of genuine modesty showing through. "But thanks for that."

"Come back soon. I want to be with you again. Go put yourself out there and have fun also, I won't get jealous and would enjoy hearing about it."

We were both propped up on our elbows facing each other. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and clasp Lamar's cock again. He had taken a restroom break and rinsed off all the lube, but the ample skin flowed up and down his uncircumcised shaft easily. "May I?" I asked. "I just want to feel it one more time before I go."

He nodded appreciatively. "You're hard again," he said. I looked down, and sure enough, I had gone to full mast just talking about sex and touching his penis again. I really needed some release. He had the lube nearby, and he brought it out and worked some of it on my penis. "Let me get you off," he said. I nodded. His skilled hands already had me close after all the foreplay of getting fucked. Then suddenly he took his hands off me. He rolled over to his stomach and turned his head to the side facing me. "Lay on top of me for a minute," he said.

I had no idea what Lamar was doing, but I happily straddled him. His ass felt great beneath my cock. I moved my hips around reflexively, grinding my slippery erection all over his nether regions. He was pushing his butt back also. He spread his legs to shoulder width, then a bit more. I noticed he had a pillow under his crotch already, raising his butt higher and making it more accessible. Before I lay on him completely, I slid back a bit and took another look at his nice ass. The cheeks quivered slightly from my movement. There was a slight gap with his spread legs, and between those perfect ebony cheeks I saw a glimpse of the darker, more inviting target between them. I settled onto him and pressed my face against his. He grabbed my hand that was over his head, and surprised me with his request. "You're going to put it in me to finish, okay?"

"Seriously?" I said.

"It's about time I tried it, and I can't think of a better guy to do it with. Let me finish you off like this. Get it in quick. Don't you dare refuse me."

He was ready, and I knew he needed no lingering preparation. He wanted my cock immediately. It was a little weird, because I was definitely more of a receptive bottom now. I knew that. But this was still doable. I wasn't sure why, but I didn't wait to sort it all out on my head. I pressed against his ass and slowly pushed forward. I realized this position would work well. I leaned a little forward to angle my cock down some, and I passed his entrance with little difficulty. He gave a marvelous groan as I sunk inside. It was heavenly. So tight, it was nothing like any women I had been with. The entrance gripped me like a vice, but after that he was wide open. The muscles formed a tight ring that slid down the length of my shaft.

"Wow, now that is big," he said.

"That's good for me too, damn," I grunted in his ear.

"Cum for me," Lamar said.

I was very aroused, and now I knew why. It wasn't the traditional mentality of the top. It was knowing this man was spreading his cheeks and going to extra mile for me. I knew he would only do that for someone he cared about and respected. Here was the stud of all studs, the big-dicked black guy that had initiated over a hundred people, asking me to fuck him in the ass. He'd never asked anyone to fuck him before until now.

My first thrust made it to the hilt. I followed it up with only about five more thrusts, and that was enough. I didn't want to hold it anyway, because I knew Lamar wanted me to cum. I shuddered as I buried my cock deep and emptied myself into him.

Author's note: Thanks for taking the time to read. Please comment. Which act turned you on the most? Our first time together for the Initiation, or later with some experience behind me?

initiation

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